There's a Hole in the Bucket

My parents have been e-mailing and calling me multiple times a day for the last several days. There is no family crisis brewing, no one is dying, no one is in jail.... nope, the subject of these repeated calls is what to get my daughter for her birthday. I told them, I sent them links, but in those links were options. Just like with my kids, I said all options are acceptable, pick what works for you... yet still they call. First, the home phone rings, then the cell. And yes, I'm now avoiding them and instead posting bloggy rants...

With every message on the answering machine, voicemail, and e-mail, I am reminded of two bits of popular culture:

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1) The Monty Python scene in Life of Brian where he is trying to shake the followers. He tells someone to "fuck off" and the disciple replies, "but how shall we fuck off?"

2) This children's song:

There's a hole in the bucket,Dear Liza, dear Liza

There's a hole in the bucket,Dear Liza, there's a hole.

Then fix it, dear Henry,Dear Henry, dear Henry

Then fix it, dear Henry,Dear Henry, fix it.

With what shall I fix it,Dear Liza, dear Liza?

With what shall I fix it,Dear Liza, with what?

With a straw, dear Henry,Dear Henry, dear Henry

With a straw, dear Henry,Dear Henry, with a straw.

But the straw is too long,Dear Liza, dear Liza

But the straw is too long,Dear Liza, too long

Then cut it, dear Henry,Dear Henry, dear Henry

Then cut it, dear Henry,Dear Henry, cut it.

With what shall I cut it,Dear Liza, dear Liza?

With what shall I cut it,Dear Liza, with what?

With an axe, dear Henry,Dear Henry, dear Henry

With an axe, dear Henry,Dear Henry, an axe.

The axe is too dull,Dear Liza, dear Liza

The axe is too dull,Dear Liza, too dull

Then sharpen it, dear Henry,Dear Henry, dear Henry

Then sharpen it, dear Henry,Dear Henry, sharpen it.

With what shall I sharpen it,Dear Liza, dear Liza?

With what shall I sharpen it,Dear Liza, with what?

With a stone, dear Henry,Dear Henry, dear Henry

With a stone, dear Henry,Dear Henry, a stone.

The stone is too dry,Dear Liza, dear Liza

The stone is too dry,Dear Liza, too dry

Then wet it, dear Henry,Dear Henry, dear Henry

Then wet it, dear Henry,Dear Henry, wet it.

With what shall I wet it,Dear Liza, dear Liza?

With what shall I wet it,Dear Liza, with what?

With water, dear Henry,Dear Henry, dear Henry

With water, dear Henry,Dear Henry, with water.

How shall I get it,Dear Liza, dear Liza,

How shall I get it,Dear Liza, how shall I?

In the bucket, dear Henry,Dear Henry, dear Henry

In the bucket, dear Henry,Dear Henry, in the bucket.

There's a hole in the bucket.

Okay, enough ranting, time to call the folks back...